Learning to Drive at 34

Learning to drive is stressful in this day and age, with all the distractions people have at their fingertips. Plus, when you’re 16, you think yourself invincible; whereas at 34 you’re very aware that you’re not. It also doesn’t help the stress knowing your vehicle cost more than your average car or van because of all the modifications you had to add to make it drivable for a weakened Spinal Muscular Atrophy (SMA) body such as mine.

Though, while it has been stressful, it has also been rewarding and liberating. While it has taken longer than I would have liked or expected, it reminds me to be patient with others, and more importantly, myself.

Since I had driven before with hand controls when I was 16, I assumed it would be just as easy, if not easier. How wrong I was. For one thing, I am weaker now than I was when I was 16, which has been easy for me to forget sometimes, and the controls are very different from what I used back then. Back when I was 16, the hand controls I used had a handle to the left of the steering wheel that was physically tied to the accelerator and brake pedals, which meant you could either push forward for brake, or down for accelerator. In my current setup, while I have a similar system for accelerator and brake, my accelerator is electronic, which means I can activate it while pressing forward for the brake. That was quite the adventure discovering that little aspect. I went to apply the brake, and ended up pushing down on the accelerator as well in the equivalent of jamming the accelerator down with your foot. The end result was me driving over an island in a church parking lot, barely missing a fire hydrant, tree, and large rock. It was very terrifying.

Another difference in my system is how I steer. I use a specialized horizontal steering system to the right of the wheel that turns my wheel for me as I rotate it clockwise or counterclockwise. I had taken a lot to get used to, especially since I am used to driving a chair that only requires me to tilt my hand to the left or right to turn. It’s a little more sensative than I am used to, but it’s not bad. Like all areas of learning to drive, it has taken some getting used to, though I have been getting better.

I did have quite the experience on June 11th when I was driving my wife and I to her parent’s house for dinner. The route we took was very straight forward and only had one major turn, albeit a left hand turn. During that turn, because of oncoming traffic, I had to turn at a speed a little higher than I am normally comfortable with. That resulted in me losing my ballance and swerving the van through the turn. It was kind of terrifying, but I didn’t crash or hit anything! And Arielle was super calm during the whole thing. I’m pretty sure I was freaking out enough for the both of us.

Now that I am back on my medication (future post on that), and I am being fitted for lateral supports, driving should start to go more smoothly. I’m really excited to see how it all turns out!